Do You Understand Your Parents?

August 18, 2006

Our four-week-old son is still in the hospital after being born almost 12 weeks early.  Last night, as we were getting ready to go to sleep, my husband asked, “Do you think Gus will understand us?”
I asked why he was concerned about that at the moment.  My husband has been trying to manage his mother (a wonderful woman, but we can talk about in-law issues some other time), who is trying her best to be helpful during our trying days as new parents to a preemie who’s got many more weeks in NICU.  But she is butting in some areas that are causing us more stress than if she just left us alone.

That’s a different issue, but what was troubling my husband is that he just doesn’t understand why she’s acting like this and why she can’t be a little more sensitive to what we need right now.  This got him projecting several years in the future and wondering if someday our sweet little boy, who we barely know right now, will be looking at us and wondering who the hell we are.

Do you understand your parents?  Do you understand your kids?  Do you think they understand you?  Does it matter, and if so, how much?  Just an odd little question running through my head right now.  In a nutshell, I don’t understand my parents sometimes, but I’ve gotten to the point where it doesn’t matter.  I’ve also grown up to the point that what they don’t understand about me, I can live with, because we all seemed to accept it.  Is that just the nature of things?  Is that the kernel of the saying, “You can pick your friends but you can’t pick your family?”  And shouldn’t I just be enjoying my little guy right now and not even bothering with questions like this?  

Well, anyway, have a great weekend everyone!