Guilty Diversions

September 10, 2006

A friend sent me Arnold Schwarzenegger’s recent comments about Cubans and Puerto Ricans. After all, I am half Cuban (my father) and Puerto Rican (mother). Here are his off-the-cuff remarks that made it into the Los Angeles Times:

“I mean Cuban, Puerto-Rican, they are all very hot,” the governor says on the recording. “They have the, you know, part of the black blood in them and part of the Latino blood in them that together makes it.”

He meant to say that we are “hot-blooded,” or feisty. But given that the governor can’t speak English, it came out as just “hot.” To that, I say “damn right!” Too bad I can’t say the same about him.

Speaking of someone else who is not hot, have you seen Flavor Flav’s reality show, Flavor of Love? I had one of his albums in the 80s when he was part of Public Enemy. But, man, was I completely turned off to him when I read a Q&A with him in People magazine. What a misogynist asshole:

If a woman wants to catch your eye, what should she do? No. 1: Have on some nice clothes. No. 2: Smell good. No. 3: Don’t be obnoxious. No. 4: Have good character.

Describe your dream girl. I want a girl who looks good when she wakes up in the morning. We could take her face and dip it in dough and she’ll make some nice-face cookies. Some girls wake up, man, you could put their face in dough and you’ll get a gorilla cookie, for real!…I’ve had some beastlies on my show.

Never mind he isn’t a looker himself. His ideal girl also has to have “good housewife skills.” Someone needs to welcome this guy into the 21st century.

One man who oozes sexiness and class is Brad Pitt. Recently, he told Esquire magazine that he and Angelina Jolie would wed when everyone in the country could marry legally. He also shed some light into his parenting, which includes being an adoptive dad to two children:

“They’re as much of my blood as any natural born, and I’m theirs,” Pitt tells the magazine, which hits newsstands Sept. 19. “That’s all I can say about it. I can’t live without them. So: Anyone considering (adoption), that’s my vote.”

And Pitt says he’s a pretty laid back dad.

“I try not to stifle them in any way,” he says. “If it’s not hurting anyone, I want them to be able to explore. Sometimes that means they’re quite rambunctious.”

Hot.

Here’s one woman who has all the luck in the world: Valerie Wilson, who works at a Long Island deli, has won $1 million through the state lottery — again. She won her first million on a scratch ticket game four years ago.

“The first time I couldn’t believe it,” Wilson told Newsday. “This time I said, ‘God’s on my side…”

There have been only two previous repeat million-dollar-plus winners in the lottery’s history, according to the state.

Wilson still hasn’t quit her job at Emma’s Deli and Catering. Despite her unexpected bonus, Wilson plans to keep working until at least December, making sandwiches and ringing up sales.

The prize will be paid out in $50,000 installments over 20 years. Wilson said she used her first winnings to help buy homes for her three children.

“This one is going to be for me,” she said. “I’m going to live a little bit.”

Good for her.